Transcript from the first stop on my imaginary book tour. Had a great time in NYC. Great food. Great hotel. But so cold.Kathie Lee: We’re joined now by debut author Stacy McAnulty. She’s written a new book about Barbie.
Me: It’s not really about Barbie.
Hoda: But it’s call My Life According to Barbie.
Me: Yes. There is a definite Barbie element.
Kathie Lee: How long did you live your life according to Barbie?
Me: I didn’t. It’s fiction.
Hoda: It’s not a memoir?
Me: No. It’s a novel.
Hoda: Tell us about the book. I love the cover.
Me: Well… It’s about a divorced woman… a fictitious woman… named Paige who agrees to live her life according to the implied moral code of the Barbie Doll. It’s really a romantic comedy.
Hoda: Why does she do this?
Me: To help her teenaged daughter out. Paige doesn’t want her own daughter to take part in the sociology experiment so she offers to be the guinea pig.
Kathie Lee: I’ve been a guinea pig a couple of time.
Hoda: Getting Botox doesn’t count as being a guinea pig.
Kathie Lee: You just wait. (Turning back to me.) So how do you… I mean this fictitious character lives her life according to Barbie? What are the rules?
Me: She actually has 16 goals or guidelines. The most important is WWBD? – What would Barbie Do?
Kathie Lee: I like that.
Me: She has more specific rules like not leaving the house without complete make-up, perfect hairs, and feminine clothes including high heels.
Hoda: I notice you are wearing sneakers.
Me: Yeah. It’s not about me.
Kathie Lee: Maybe it’s time for another ambush make-over. (She points to me.)
Me: Okay.
Hoda: No, she’s fine. Except maybe those eyebrows.
Me: I would like to freshen my highlights. (I stare off dreaming of a new wardrobe from NYC.)
Kathie Lee: And definitely shape wear and a padded bra.
Me: Huh?
Kathie Lee: Would you be willing to have plastic surgery on air?
Me: Wait. What?
Kathie Lee: Not today. Maybe next week. It could be our next series. Ambush Plastic Surgery.
Hoda: Let’s get back to talking about the book. Our 90 seconds is almost up.
Kathie Lee: Right. So “Paige” needs to apply make-up, do her hair and wear a ball gown to hit the grocery store.
Me: Maybe not a ball gown.
Kathie Lee: Sounds like a lot of work. Happy hour would have to start at 8 A.M.
Me: That’s another rule. No drinking.
Kathie Lee: Where do I NOT sign up. (She pulls a bottle of red out and pours two generous glasses.)
Me: I’d like a glass.
Kathie Lee: But you said that’s a rule – no drinking.
Me: It’s not about me.
Hoda: (After pouring me a glass.) Where did the idea for the novel come from?
Me: (After emptying my glass of wine.) Church.
Kathie Lee: Amen sister!
Me: The minister asked who is the ultimate role model. He mockingly suggested Barbie. I thought he had a point. She’s high achieving, physically fit, and independent.
Kathie Lee: We got two great role models right here. (She gestures between herself and Hoda. Then they touch glasses and finish off the wine.)
Hoda: What’s up next?
Kathie Lee: I think we are doing a segment with Paula Deen.
Hoda: I was speaking to our guest. (She points to me.)
Me: I’m still promoting My Life According to Barbie. We are in the 2 digit sales range but I’m hoping for three digits.
Hoda: What a goal.
Me: And I’m working on my next novel.
Kathie Lee: Is it about Ken or Midge?
Hoda: Or Skipper?
Me: Actually, it’s a thriller. Totally uninspired by any of Mattel’s creations.
Kathie Lee: Sounds normal.
Hoda: Thank you for being here. (She turns to the camera.) The book is called My Life According to Barbie. And it’s not a memoir.
Kathie Lee: It’s fiction. (She gives me a wink.)
Me: Thanks for having me.
Kathie Lee: We’ll call you about that plastic surgery bit. Two words for you. Breast Augmentation.
Hoda: It’s what Barbie would do. (Fits of laughter from the women and crew.)
Loved your interview with those two NYC ladies, but obviously they just don't get it! Maybe they'll read the book and become believers.
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